French for Cats: All the French Your Cat Will Ever Need Review

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French for Cats: All the French Your Cat Will Ever Need ReviewIn this delightful little book, wonderfully and perceptively illustrated with humourous line-art drawings, you will, as the title suggests, find 'All the French Your Cat will Ever Need'. For those of you who follow my writing, you may find this review to be shorter than average. There is a good reason for this -- the book is shorter than average; about 80 pages or so, and on average fewer than 20 words per page.
In this volume, you will learn what a French cat (le chat) does...
Je miaule, Je ronronne, Je dors
(I meow, I purr, I sleep)
Je cours rapidement d'une piece a l'autre sans aucune raison apparente
(I run rapidly from room to room for no apparent reason)
Je reste assis et je regarde fixement dans le vide pendant des heures
(I sit and stare at nothing for hours on end)
...and does not do...
Je ne cours pas apres les voitures
(I do not chase cars)
Je n'attrape pas les Frisbees dans ma bouche
(I do not catch Frisbees in my mouth)
Of course, the French cat will need appropriate food (gourmet, no less)...
L'Oiseau, La Souris, Le Poisson, Le Vilaine Grosse Bestiole
(the bird, the mouse, the fish, the big ugly bug)
...served in an elegant manner...
Le Bol pour Manger
(the Food Bowl)
...served at the appropriate time.
Je veux qu'on remplisse mon bol
(I want food in my bowl)
Je veux qu'on remplisse mon bol immediatement
(I want food in my bowl now)
...
J'attends qu'on me serve...
(I'm waiting...)
Of course, a responsible cat person will need to subject le chat to the occasion unpleasant experience...
Surtout je n'aime pas aller chez le veterinaire
(I really do not like to go to the vet)
Je ne veux pas qu'on me pique avec une aiguille enorme
(I do not want to be studck with a huge needle)
Je ne veux pas etre chatre
(I do not want to be neutered)
So, if you ever wondered what it would be like for your cat to produce a fur-ball in French (voila!) or the craftiness of French cat-thinking (how to get the enemy lawn mower to attack the bad neighbour child), this book is definitely for you.
Beware, however, even though this is 'All the French Your Cat Will Ever Need', there is a second helping, 'Advanced French for Exceptional Cats', to be found in a second volume exclusively for 'sophisticated cats as smart as yours'.
To be sure to understand le chat with savoir-faire, both volumes are an absolute necessity. Written by Henri de la Barbe (Henry Beard) (also know for scholarly necessities 'Latin for All Occasions' and 'Miss Piggy's Guide to Life'), and illustrated with wit and charm by Gary Zamchick, these books make delightful fun reading for an hour, and perfect gifts for cat lovers and francophiles alike.French for Cats: All the French Your Cat Will Ever Need OverviewOne of the hot gift books of '91, '92, and on.

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